As Mother's Day comes to a close, it is my mom that is on my mind. Looking back over the past five years, I don't think there is any other person that has consistently given so much of themselves to me.
Five years ago today, I am quite sure that none of us really had a concept of what was ahead. I had just been diagnosed with cancer and my mother, recently retired, had just moved my grandmother from Washington state to our family home in California to care for her. As if the job of caring for your aging mother is not enough, within a matter of weeks, my mom had even more loaded on her plate. Every two weeks, for the next six months (& nearly once a month for the two years after that), she drove five hours to Napa to care for my two children, both still in diapers. On many trips, she also had my grandmother in tow---juggling four generations at Camp Kaywoodie.
As I reflect back on that time, I don't know what words even begin to describe what her presence did for me. The process of leaving my young children each time I went away for treatment was heart wrenching. I weaned my daughter in the days before I began chemo and my son was still a 'mommy-rock-me-back-to-sleep, multiple-time-a-night-waker.' I simply don't know how I would have had the focus and energy to fight the fight I did, each time, if it weren't for knowing that Grandma Marilynn was on deck. Hugging, cooking, cleaning, diapering, loving, and willingly making up and telling the crazy 'Bob & Sally' bedtime sagas we had created as a nightly family tradition. She was my rock.
Skip forward five years to this time last week, and not much has changed. Once again I left home, for five days (only this time knowing I would come home feeling great) and it was Grandma Marilynn who stepped in to man the kid front. Gone were the days of diapering, 'Bob & Sally' stories and midnight feedings, replaced by squabbling sibs, homework and fart-humor; but one thing remains the same--the love and support of my mom, makes so much possible for me.
Each time my mom left when I was in treatment, I would sit on the curb and watch her go with tears streaming down my face. In the last couple of years, it is my daughter that has taken on that job---as that white car rolls away down Kaywoodie, she breaks into sobs. This time Grandma left, and I could see my daughter was trying very hard to control herself---the car pulled away, no tears, and she looked up at me and with a wavering voice said "see mommy, this time I didn't cry". All was well until she saw the tear roll down my cheek and then we both had a sniffle together.
Happy Mother's Day Mom! I LOVE YOU!
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